My Supports

There are too many other people in my life that provide support to adequately describe them all here, but suffice it to say that I firmly believe that we are a product of those whom we touch and who touch us.

My Connections to Play

Play never goes anywhere... we do. We just have to find our way back from time to time.

They say that our most vivid memories are tied to extreme emotion, whether good or bad. I’d hate to think of why I have such a limited number of memories from childhood, but the few that I do have are certainly times of great joy. From birth, my grandmother’s house was the family gathering place and we did so on a regular basis. I grew up surrounded by loving, caring adults and what seemed an abundance of playmates - in actuality it was usually one to four siblings with one or two cousins added into the mix from time to time.

We spent hours upon hours playing in my grandparent’s yard: a child’s forest of huge pine trees dotted with the occasional "hicker nut" and cedar, all of which supplied us with an endless supply of needles, leaves and burrs from which we created our very own Roxaboxen. Before I was big enough to actually man a rake, I watched intently as everyone else carefully cleared paths and formed “walls” of pine needle berms forming the outlines of our playhouse. We had a wonderfully intricate cedar tree a bit like the one shown, whose branches were low and twisted that created a perfect stable for our stick horses or just a cozy place to climb and sit (even though I was probably never more than two feet off the ground, I was in heaven).

Play was simple then. We had unspoken rules that guided us and I learned from my older siblings and cousins how to create and cooperate within the context of whatever our play afforded us on any given day. There was no limit to what our imaginations could accomplish and my grandfather made sure that we had whatever we needed to expand our play; even if the sun was setting in the sky, he turned on enough lights to keep it from setting on our fun. I’m sure he must have spent hours after we were gone searching for tools that we had borrowed or raking up our “walls” creating a fresh surface for our next visit. But we knew our limits, we respected them, we thrived within them. That half-acre was our countryside, those few individuals were our community and the world was whatever we wanted it to be!

Cicada shells were our Gold/money.
Years later, my grandfather was
still finding these hidden in the
chimney clean out. Good
thing they had central heating!

These are the roots that firmly grounded me to the value and joy of shear make believe and I was diligent to make sure that my children experienced as much of that as I could provide. Granted their back yard was measured in yards instead of acreage, but we had trees to climb, grass to run barefoot through and neighborhood children to join in the work of childhood. Like me, my girls spent hours outside exploring the world and creating a new one every chance they got and like my grandfather, their dad and I were more than willing to support them in any way we could. Limits were set only by the boundaries of fences, sidewalks and streets – not by their imaginations. Fortunately, we also have a cabin in the mountains where there are fewer restrictions and practically unlimited opportunities for all kinds of play experiences. I remember one particular time that my kids returned after several hours of playing in the woods with friends, out of breath and talking so excitedly that I could hardly understand what they were jabbering about. My heart once again leapt with childish glee to hear them describing their own Roxaboxen just over the hill.

If you have not yet seen this book, it is a must read for anyone who has the gift of creating something wonderful from nothing much at all. It would be my hope that all children could have the opportunity to experience the joy of unbridled imagination, whether it is in a back yard with a rake and a stick or in their room with a couple of chairs and a sheet. I don’t recall experiencing a time when I felt like I needed to escape, but it was wonderfully reassuring to know that if I just wanted to, I could. It breaks my heart to see children who have no idea how to use their imagination and I feel blessed to be in a career that enables me to facilitate opportunities for them to develop this valuable life giving skill.

I know there have been times in my life where I held the mistaken opinion that I was too mature to “play” or times when play seemed irresponsible and frivolous but as I continue to mature and my responsibilities continue to change and increase, I find that play is what keeps me moving forward. Even though time is limited most days, I still find an innate joy in being outside, getting my hands dirty or losing myself in a book or craft. It is true that kids place a heavy load of responsibility on the adults who care for and about them but it is equally as true that if you allow yourself to be an active participant in their world, they will also keep you young.

Play is more of a state of mind than an intentional act and is limited neither by age nor occupation! 

But thank God I get to play AND get paid!

Relationship Reflection

As humans we are relational by nature, none of us has grown in a vacuum of solitude. We begin building relationships before we are even born, only at that time we did not have to actively participate. Throughout life, however, relationships come and go, wax and wane as we develop and mature.  Early playmates help us navigate youth as we strive for independence and find our place in the world, friendships develop that aid our transition from childhood to adulthood, but it is generally our families who provide the first and most lasting relationships – albeit positive or negative. Personal connections have been the driving force for me since I can remember: interaction promoting stimulation and growth, proximity supplying security, contact fulfilling intimacy and commitment translating into worthiness. Admittedly I spent many years avoiding solitude, fearing that without another person these needs would go unmet. Fortunately, though, I finally learned that until I had a healthy relationship with myself, the others would suffer.

Mother and Amanda

My mother has always been my safety net as well as my ladder. With her in my corner, the world was mine. She and I have a very special bond of friendship that transcends that of my youth and a mutual respect that allows us to live independent yet intertwined lives. One of the things I appreciate most is that for years Mother and I have made it a point to travel together (including my children usually) on at least an annual basis, almost without fail, often providing my girls with many experiences that they otherwise would have missed and reinforcing in them the importance of family and celebrating life’s simple pleasures as she did for me as a child.

I wish I could say that our relationship has always been smooth sailing, but we have experienced our share of conflict. Like most teens, I was probably more inconsiderate than I realized and as an adult I struggle to learn more positive communication skills. But, as I said – she will never give up on me which gives me power and motivation not to give up on myself.

At Renaissance Festival

My oldest daughter, Amanda, is my “little angel” (and a carbon copy in too many respects sometimes) and has a wisdom that I definitely lacked at her age (not to say she always takes her own advise, but that is a whole other story!) In this respect, she has a lot of her father in her. We enjoy each other’s company and many interests but mostly I love to talk with her. Others have recognized and supported my many talents over the years so I know how meaningful and important it is – so I do all I can to do that for her. Some talents we share, but most are hers alone which only lends to her uniqueness and beauty.

She cleans up pretty well, huh!

Joscelyn is my baby and I’m sure will be until I’m gone. Since she is still stuck in the middle of her teen years it would be irresponsible of me to say that we have a wonderful relationship, but – what the heck – we do. Sure, we fight. Of course, we disagree. We even pick on and tease each other probably more than the outside world may be comfortable with, but at the end of the day we have a closeness that will survive the test of time. The greatest challenge that I face with her is my inability to make sense of her world sometimes. She has a distinctive way of looking at life that completely escapes me most of the time, but we always tend to work it out or simply agree to disagree.

No matter what I have gotten myself into in the last twenty plus years, Terri has always been there to help me through it. Sometimes she drug me, sometimes she pushed me, but always she was there, supporting and encouraging. I often feel like our friendship is lopsided, that she gives me more than I can reciprocate but she assures me that isn’t so and even though she and I have only known each other half our lives (sounds like a lot when you say it that way!) it seems like forever and while we only see each other a few times a year, we always pick up right were we left off.  The thing I appreciate most is that she is deeply honest with me. She is the kind of friend who will tell me when I am an idiot and kick me in the pants when I need it not to mention the fact that she often "gets" Josc so she serves as my interpreter!  I think I just add a little comic relief (OK, perhaps even a sounding board) when she needs to escape her whirlwind reality.

What more is there to say, other than Christ has always been there – and will always be here.  My relationship with him began as a teen but solidified after the death of my husband. I felt His arms around me holding me up and I continue to lean on Him as I seek His will for my life. I am not one to believe in coincidence; I believe everything happens for a reason whether we understand or not. I know that He has put people and circumstances into my life that have challenged and changed me. Too often I let life get in the way of our talks and I overlook opportunities to serve Him, but He always Hears, always Forgives and Always Loves!

Thank you

Recently, a student at school sent a letter of gratitude to the employees of Tempe High. While this is just a glimpse into her note, she expresses her sincere appreciation for the dedication of the entire staff and accredits student success to our commitment "even after we have all gone home."

To be honest, this is what keeps me going day after day. This is why I teach. This is why children are so important! They are the future and we DO make a difference!

What wonders will you find?
Where will you be brave enough to dig?
What tools will you take with you on your journey?

Testing: AZ vs NSW

FROM TEXT: “an IQ test is a snapshot, providing a static, framed view of a dynamic, ever-developing brain at work.” (p 325)


Fortunately, not all researchers agree that this is the only measure of a child's intelligence. Not only does Robert Sternberg see formal intelligence as being complimented by creativity and practical application, but Howard Gardner also believes that intelligence is the relationship of specific areas in which individuals may be more adept or talented. His theory of Multiple Intelligences includes everything from language and mathematical aptitude to a propensity towards relationships and spirituality. Particularly useful are his inclusion of learning strengths in the areas of kinesthetics and music which may create a more conducive learning environment for some children; setting up a battle field and acting out skirmishes of a given war or setting the names of states or multiplication tables to chants or tunes helps some children retain the information more easily because it involved more of their brain than just the left, analytical side.  It seems to reason then, that testing children exclusively through the use of pencil to paper tests only assesses, as the textbook stated, a portion of the child’s achievement and potential.

In Arizona, children begin standardized testing in the third grade. AIMS (Arizona’s Instrument to Measure Standards) was developed in responses to NCLB and tests students from grades 3-12 in the areas of Reading, Writing, Math and Science and is a requirement for high school graduation. (There are of course exceptions in the cases of some students with IEPs.) In terms of assessing children holistically these tests, in my opinion, do little more than a standard IQ. Students who learn or express learning non-linguistically are at a considerable disadvantage. I suppose the theory may be that if children are tested on a regular basis they will eventually become adept at this form of evaluation so that by the time they reach the critical stage (sophomore year in high school) they will perform more confidently; who knows?  I do wish that I could figure out how to conduct these mandatory exams in such a way that provides each student the opportunity to excel in a way that is most proficient for him/her.

I spoke to my friend, Terri, regarding her family’s experiences with education in Australia a few years ago when her husband was transferred down under for a year. The cultural differences were vast for the entire family, but especially for their two children (then 1^st and 5^th grades). In first grade, student’s social/emotional development took precedence over academic achievement because if a child isn’t socially or emotionally ready to cope with the demands of formal education and peers they will not be ready to learn content information. At parent/teacher conferences considerable time was spent discussing the children’s home life and their transition into a new culture with no focus on learning gaps or homework.  When Terri specifically asked about her son’s homework (5^th grade) the teacher seemed surprised and offered to give him some if Terri insisted. The expectation was that students give 110% when they are at school and then go home and play – since play and physical activity are just as important as academic achievement. In fact, physical education is an integral part of the school day; when the body is in motion it is preparing the brain for learning. Sports are valued as opportunities to gain social competence: cooperation, relationships, and emotions such as disappointment. Even family vacations and travel are viewed as valuable educational opportunities instead of inconveniently planned absences.

Soon I hope to be posting a copy of the children’s report cards which illustrate the subjectivity of their evaluations. Students are graded on the teacher’s perception of their proficiency and well roundedness. Children are seen as holistic individuals with varying skills. There are few formal tests, instead comprehension is checked orally and children progress as they become proficient at a task. Unfortunately, this usually results in a form of tracking where students fall into a given range of ability and seldom work their way up.

Another interesting aspect of Australian education is the modular academic focus. Teachers concentrate on a specific content area throughout the year in order to build a thorough understanding of it before moving on instead of the choppy schedule seen in US elementary schools. Reading and writing are the primary focus in the first grade followed by mastery of other subjects such as Science, History and Math in subsequent years. Don’t misunderstand, there are activities that prepare students for the next unit, they are simply not the primary objective. Incremental counting drills (counting by 2, 4, 5, 7, etc…) prepare students for higher math skills in later grades.

Similar to AIMS, the ICAS (International Competitions and Assessments for Schools) is a pen/paper test developed by the University of New South Wales, Sydney, Australia. Students are also tested beginning in the 3^rd year but the testing subjects include Computers Skills along with Mathematics, English (Reading), Spelling, Writing, and Science.  In viewing the practice tests, I noticed that test questions for 3^rd grade differed primarily in the area of Math where children in Arizona are expected to have a firm understanding of fractions while children in Australia were evaluated on their counting, and recognition of geometrical objects. Of course other content areas differed as well, but the primary difference is the purpose of their testing which is to identify students learning strengths and weaknesses in order to assist their learning. Students who perform well are also eligible to receive medals of distinction and certificates instead of waiting for years in hopes of receiving a diploma.

What is the answer? I’m not sure. Children certainly need to be assessed in order to evaluate their individual needs as well as abilities, but how to do it in such a way that includes the entire child’s knowledge bank is beyond me. Perhaps at some point there will be a way to differentiate testing sufficiently that students can demonstrate their learning in more practical ways: in ways that make sense to them. Perhaps one day children can be valued for their individual learning styles and not seen just as a series of bubbles filled in on a form. Perhaps… some day…

Chaos: at home, at school, around the world

My whole life seems to be a constant state of chaos with only glimmers of sanity thrown in to keep me striving for something more. For me, however, most of my current chaos is self-inflicted and is rooted in a deep seated avoidance for the word “no”. Since I have very few childhood memories, I find it a challenge to recall much from my early years and I can only guess at some things given the circumstances at the time. My parents divorced prior to my birth in which time my mother and two older sisters moved in with my grandparents.  As a toddler my mother remarried and I now had three big brothers added to the scene on a regular but not daily basis. I have photographs of the apartment in Dallas where we lived near my preschool and an increasing number of memories of the house we lived in during my kindergarten and early elementary years. During the summer between second and third grades we moved out to the country where I lived until moving to Arizona to attend college. Like every family we had our challenges and some tragedies so, on some level chaos was just a part of life. I fondly recall, however, the intentionality of my parents to minimize the chaos and provide stability in routines, namely regular family outings and vacations. Still, I remember feeling left out and confused at times and unaware of how to handle even peer conflict without withdrawing – on one occasion hiding under a table and pouting until I fell asleep. In retrospect, perhaps that was the beginnings of my “I’ll do as much as I can to appease and please” attitude. I remember even in kindergarten, retreating to my neighbor and best friend’s house where her mom read stories to her and we played endlessly in the yard, not wanting to go home. I just assumed that that was how every child felt. The older I got, the more secrets there seemed to be and I just lived on a “need to know” basis; a behavior that I, unfortunately, carried into adulthood seeing “trivial” information as a burden on others instead of helpful communication. None the less, I think I had it pretty good and I knew that my parents loved me and I was safe.

On the other hand, I see children in our program more often than I’d like that are experiencing a much more real form of chaos and I realize that for them too this is just a way of life and without the perspective of age this, for them, is what everyone else experiences as well. Children whose parents are in the process of divorce or have split recently so the child is bounced from house to house like a ping pong ball in play between angry adults. While I know that these situations can be navigated relatively successfully by all participants, I also know the opposite to be true when the child has two sets of expectations and the primary goal seems to be to make the other parent as angry as possible. My thought is always, “why can’t these two “adults” see what they are doing to their child?” Children come to school angry or withdrawn and the best we can do sometimes is to provide the stability that he needs during the day and enough love to make it through the next night.  It is heartbreaking to see a four year old express the guilt associated with parental breakups when they cannot be convinced that it isn’t their fault.

On the other side of the globe, the 2007 presidential elections in Kenya brought with it plenty of chaos, particularly to its children who were not only forced from their homes by the violence but were separated from their parents leaving many orphans (AP, 2008).  According to UNICEF and the Kenya Red Cross Society 150,000 children were in need of support after losing their families and experiencing extreme violence first hand.  These children harbor anger, fear and frustration over the attacks, even fearing former classmates who are Kikuyu – the attacking tribe. But, “Pamela Sittoni, a spokeswoman for the UN Children’s Fund, UNICEF, agreed. ‘A comprehensive counseling package has to be developed. [We'll be] looking at how we can follow up with these children and provide the psycho-social support they need. That has to be a priority.’" (IRIN, 2008) Fortunately, most of Kenya’s displaced children now reside in the care of these organizations but still others have been placed in camps or questionable facilities and have been passed out to adults looking for houseboys or worse. Others who were fortunate enough to have been reunited with relatives may not be any better off in the face of severe poverty, who may possibly be being used for manual labor. Consequently, UNICEF is exploring the possibility of expanding their orphan support fund in order to provide more and appropriate care for as many children as possible. Fortunately, many more organizations have sprung up in the years that have followed and continue to support efforts to help children overcome this tragedy and become functional members of society – not just survivors.

The Associated Press (2008, February 21). The lost children of Kenya’s political violence. Retrieved on January 26, 2012 from http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/23280823/ns/world_news-africa/t/lost-children-kenyas-political-violence/

IRIN humanitarian news and analysis (February 26, 2008).In-depth: Kenya's post election crisis. Retrieved on January 27, 2012 from http://www.irinnews.org/IndepthMain.aspx?InDepthID=68&ReportID=76948